This Holiday Season - Don't Be Afraid to Skip Out

With the holidays coming up, there's a lot of commercials, posts and talk about family.  This is unavoidable as it seems to be part of the season as a whole, but sadly not everyone has a chance to take part in that part of the holiday.  So the point of this post?  That's ok.

Speaking as a queer, non-christian woman in an interracial relationship, there's a lot of variety in my life that my family doesn't seem to understand.  This has become abundantly clear in the recent political climate and while it's not a matter of all out hate (it could be a lot worse and it has been in the past), there are just some things that I'm tired of explaining to them or can't even begin to explain in a way they'll understand.  So we've opted to skip my large family Thanksgiving and may or may not be following suit with Christmas - we'll see.

But the heart of the matter, and what I really want to talk about, is the hurt that comes with that.  It's really hard for me to not go to family gatherings, because it's just something I was raised doing. There's this dull shame in the pit of my stomach when I consider the idea and agree to it, because the voice in the back of my head says "But I'm supposed to" regardless of my own personal disagreements with my family.  I also know my partner has a large family who is either out of state, out of reach or just plain not a part of her life.  Situations like this lead to both of us feeling lonely, homesick and just all around left out when those required commercials and posts come up about family cheer and gatherings.

The point of this post, and me writing this, is to say that shame is wrong.  With this post I am telling myself that it's ok to skip out and if you find yourself in a similar situation this applies to you too.

There is nothing wrong with choosing to take care of yourself during the holidays and avoid situations that can become less then pleasant.  Family is family and they either will or won't agree with you and your life, but if you need to take yourself out of the situation to take care of yourself, that's perfectly ok.  There's a whole host of reasons why people might need or choose to do this and in the end only they can decide for themselves and when they do, it's ok.  Don't shame them for it.  And especially, don't shame yourself.

On our part, we're still celebrating and cooking for ourselves.  She's making dinner while I'm at work on Thanksgiving and we're getting together with a friend on Sunday who is also choosing to avoid their family gathering. I've heard other friends refer to it as 'Friendsgiving' which is just as legitimate. In the end, this holiday season is about celebrating the year and what you have.  And if you find, like us, that 2016 has been a bit much to deal with, then yes you should take a day or two off.

It doesn't mean that you love your family any less.  It doesn't make you any less of a person.  It means you're realistic and realize that above anything else you have to take care of yourself, because family and friends come and go, but you will always be stuck with yourself.  If you are trapped, then life can be miserable, even when surrounded by supposed holiday cheer. So it's ok.

No guilt.  No shame.  Take care of yourself these last couple months.  And here's to hoping that next year will be better. Or, at the very least, a little more tolerable.

Cosplay Closet - Yu Yu Hakusho

I was searching around on the internet to update some of my information on other pages to find that CosplayLab.com had actually closed down (quite a few years ago, oops).  Unfortunately this means that I've lost my list on the exact years when I made certain cosplay, so I'm starting this to record some of that information and call back to some of the very old cosplay that I've made over the years.

So lets start with one of my old favorite shows: Yu Yu Hakusho!

Yu Yu Hakusho is an anime I've loved since I was back in college and while Gundam Wing was one of the first major fandoms I participated in, this one was a close second.  I even wrote a fanfic or two and my wifey loves it as well.  So I've cosplayed quite a few characters from the show.


Kuronue - From the first movie, Kuronue was the first character I leaned toward, just because of his design and interesting story.  I was quite upset that he wasn't included in the main series, but that didn't stop me from cosplaying him.

This costume was actually made with help from my mother.  She made the vest and white waist drape while I bought the wings (Hot Topic) and pants.  Then I made the hat from a spray painted straw hat from a local thrift store.  My father also made the scythe weapon which I still have to this day and it still looks awesome.

Pitfalls of this costume?  I couldn't figure out how to make the arm ribbons work, so I ended up using electrical tape on my arms.  While this worked, it meant that I had to pull them off each day and was left with red marks from the tape.  Not something I'd recommend.

Yomi - As an anime fan I've always been drawn to villains, especially when they have interesting stories.  Like Kuronue, Yomi's backstory with Kurama also interested me and I have a love for the military jackets that show up in quite a few different series.  Yomi quickly became one of my 'dream' costumes, that I honestly didn't think I could pull off, but then decided to just go for it and do. I made the jacket, wig and Shura plush.  I also made the ears from three pairs of cheap prosthetic ears, glued together.  Boots were borrowed from a friend, but they made the costume.

The wig is actually the part I'm the most proud of.  It started out as a normal cheap black Godiva style wig cut to the right length.  Then I made the horns out of paperclay, which dries to resemble bone, but is still soft enough that I could poke holes into it and sew them into a denim frame attached on the underside of the wig.  I totally made this up as I was going, because wig tutorials weren't a huge thing on the internet yet and it mostly worked.  My only regret is that I didn't take care of it, so now the wig is far too tangled to reuse, but I still have the jacket.

Mukuro - And finally, one more from the villains, though she's not really a villain, really.  Mukuro's backstory was awesome and I loved the fact that there was a female character that kicked ass and that I felt comfortable cosplaying and was within my skill level of creation.  (Hiei in the picture is my friend Strange Land Costuming.)

I bought the pants - some super comfortable pajama ones in the right color - and made the mask and top vest piece.  Sadly I don't have better pictures then this, but I remember it was a very comfortable costume to wear and still have most of the pieces, though they don't fit anymore.

All three of these costumes are quite old, but were the most fun.  Isn't it strange seeing me back before I made dresses and ballgowns?  To be honest, this was before I became more comfortable with my body and back then I didn't think I could pull off a female outfit and still look pretty.  Obviously I don't feel that way anymore, but I still had fun cosplaying even back then.









So here's a final throw back with the Wifey as Youko Kurama in a costume made for her by Strange Land Costuming.  Also, the other Kurama is our friend Rosanna.  The below picture was taken back in 2004 if that gives you any idea how old this is. ^__^

Review: Tokyo Ghoul Vol 1

What's it about?

What would our world be like if humans weren't at the top of the food chain?  Instead, in this alternate reality, there are creatures called Ghouls who look like humans, but feed on human flesh and have creepily deadly abilities they keep hidden from everyone else.  This is Kaneki's world, and it's not too different, until he wakes up from surgery with ghoul parts and a craving for human flesh.  Now he has to not only learn about the world of ghouls, but also learn how to survive what's left of his normal life.

Thoughts?

Like most popular manga series out there, Tokyo Ghoul has an anime and that was my first exposure to the series.  Normally I would finish the anime first before even touching the manga (as I tend to like manga better and don't want to ruin the anime watching experience).  However this year has been a flurry of conventions and I haven't had the time to finish the anime and the manga was cheap at a con... so we couldn't resist. 

So which is better? I'm a bit torn, actually. 

The artist of the manga is quite good, better then a lot of manga I've seen recently.  If nothing else he certainly knows his medium and what it's capable of.  With reading the first volume I noticed a pattern of foreshadowing in many of the panels that I don't remember from the anime.  For example, all of the ghouls have a special ability that manifests as extra limbs when needed.  Touka's looks like a wing flying out her back and when you're first introduced to her and don't know what she is yet, there's a plant that perfectly mimics this effect behind her, hinting at what's to come.  Things like this are all over the manga and not integral to the story, but if you catch them it makes it that much more interesting and made want to read it a couple times to catch all the details. 

I also love how in the series Kaneki is an avid book worm and this is used to foreshadow the events his life flows through.  It's hinted at in the anime, but in the manga there's a mention in each of the chapters and it reminds me of the Shadow Girls from Revolutionary Girl Utena, though not as obvious.  It's an effective tool in the manga and a piece I love, but not something vital so I can see why it was mostly left out of the anime aside from a couple of mentions. 

As for what the anime got right, I would have to say Kaneki's reaction to his transformation and new life as a ghoul is portrayed much better in the anime.  Whether by design, or just as a result of having a much quicker story, the resulting shock and denial is much better polished in the anime.  In the manga it takes a couple chapters and the shock ends up being watered down and not as harsh.  I'm a much bigger fan of how the anime tackles this plot point, because it's more brutal and seems to more accurately portray how a person might react to such a huge change.  To put it simple, the store bought hamburger struck more of a cord then the scene in the manga.  

I think overall, I'm actually quite happy.  I like how different the two mediums are, least so far, and I think it's enough that it'll keep me from getting tired of one or the other.  At this point I'm looking forward to finishing both and comparing at the end.  I'm especially looking forward to see how they handle my favorite character - as I've heard there's quite a difference in that spot. 

Where'd I get it?

Amazon Purchase Link

Our last convention this year! Anime Fusion in Minnesota!

It's been a long year and we've traveled around a lot and met so many people!  We have one more convention this year and it's this weekend!

Stop by for our books and crafts, pillows, or just to chat.  We'll be in costume and, of course, we'll have information about the Kickstarter!

See you there and thanks for the awesome year!!

We'll be in Hudson WI this weekend at Library Con!

Yet another convention alert!

This weekend (October 15th) we'll be at Library Con in Hudson Wisconsin!

Stop by for our books and crafts, pillows, or just to chat.  We'll be in costume and, of course, we'll have information about the Kickstarter!

See you there!!

We'll be in Minneapolis MN this weekend at Gaylaxicon!

Convention alert!

This weekend (October 7-9) we're guests at Gaylaxicon in Minneapolis!

We'll have a table with our books and costumes and pillows as normal and it's during our 15 year anniversary!
Holy crap guys, 15 years!

Come see us at the con!  But don't forget, our kickstarter for MagnifiqueNoir is still running too!  If you haven't checked it out, you should.  It's Briana's new novel about a group of black, queer, magical girls who are just all around awesome!
 

See you there!!

We'll be in Milwaukee WI this weekend!

Convention alert!

Now starts October, our crazy month of back to back cons!  

This weekend (Oct 1) we'll be Sci-fi Family Day at Discovery World!

We'll have a table with our books and costumes and pillows as normal!  

But, bonus!!

As the Kickstarter for magnifiqueNOIR starts on Monday, we'll also have the preview books there and an easy QR code to get to the Kickstarter page!  We hope you stop by!

 

See you there!!